Yeah, so Ryan Lochte has been polluting the airwaves with his fabricated robbery story while in Brazil. I’m sure you’ve heard all about it since its been exhaustively covered by all news outlets, including ESPN, because, you know, August…

Lochte wasn’t robbed. He just was drunk with a couple fellow swimmers, acted like a jackass, and tried to cover his ass–ineffectively to say the least. Here’s the thing though. Do we really care that much? This guy is known to be a notorious dumbass. This whole story really isn’t surprising when you realize who is behind it. In fact, I’d be willing to be Lochte, at one point, actually believed the story he created. And because he is who he is, I’m sure the other guys were content with him taking the front. Its Ryan Lochte for christs sake, guy is a moron.

I truly believe the only reason we are obsessing about it is because of what I said. Its August. No one reeeally cares about the Olympics. Football isn’t reeeally underway. Unlike G-Spot, ya’ll don’t care about European soccer. Baseball is still 162 regular season baseball. And the NBA doesn’t start until October. We need something to suck on and Ryan Lochte provided the teet. Props to you Ryan.


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